The Emotional Roller coaster of ‘Breaking Bad’s’ ‘To’hajiilee’

Sunday night was almost the end for me. To’hajiilee was as emotionally confusing as its name. At first I was perplexed – why is Hank mashing up brains in his kitchen? Why are they deceiving poor Huell? Are those two i’s right next to a j?

Then, when clarity finally broke through, I was mainly impressed that I understood everything the first time around. Then, I was impressed by Hank and Jesse. Then, the consequences kick in and you witness this squirmish, dying man desperately trying to hold on to the only thing he still has: money.

I know the whole premise of Breaking Bad is that Walter White breaks bad. Or becomes this evil drug kingpin. So, as I was texting my friend during the episode, “Am I a psychopath for feeling sorry for him?” For even, kind of, rooting for him while he makes his pathetic attempt at salvage?

But Gilligan is the expert at the color grey and while we know the money is going towards his family, it’s still steeped in blood, betrayal, and ego. And the confusion comes swooping in again. Until next time, BB.

-Alyson Penn


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